Here goes… the list!
(NOTE: If none of these things sick you out you are probably the parent of a small child.)
Kid Gross-isms (brought to you by Cooper and Carrington)
- "MOM! I HAVE A BOOGER!" - As if boogers aren't gross enough, Cooper tells me each time he finds a treasure and expects me to do something with it. My usual response is to "please use a tissue" and "go put it in the trash" to which I usually get nothing but a blank stare. The best is when he catches me in public when I have nothing better to do with it than put it in my pocket and grab the hand sanitizer at the next turn. Sorry to all who witnessed at the Children's Museum last week!
- How much food can go down a tiny shirt? - This mostly happens to Sister but I'm always shocked at the volume of food that somehow gets tucked away in there. The other day Kyle undressed her and I swear a half cup of mixed veggies came out of her onesie, on her shag carpet no less! This is the reason that when I find a whole goldfish floating in the bathtub instead of thinking "Hmmm, that's odd!" I'm looking for its mates!
- Mission food recovery! - Don't lie, if you found a half eaten Nilla Wafer stuck to a baby chin you'd eat it, right? Because, hey, it was probably your cookie to begin with. I can't count how many times I've done this. Probably more staggering is the amount of times I've done this without even realizing it was happening. It's been a long time since I let a little baby drool get me down!
- The sniff test - It should just be a written rule that any stray sock or pair of underoos found on the floor are dirty. But, no. Every article I find on the floor must, for some reason, undergo the Mom sniff test. 99% of the time I find myself inhaling little boy stink or the smell of old milk. Why do I continue to do this? Why?
- It's just a little baby pee! - I don't know how many times I've heard Kyle say this. I used to be so shocked and turned off by this but I have totally succumbed. I'm not saying that we don't change sheets and put kids into clean dry clothes if accidents happen. We do! BUT, if I'm out in public and Sister has a little leak and a tiny bit just happens to get on my shirt I am NOT racing home to change. I mean, it's just a little baby pee!
Don't leave me hanging…What gross things do your kids do that no longer make you even bat an eyelash?
The shining faces that make it all possible!