A Day in the Life of a Working Mom

I've had a lot of conversations with my Mom friends lately about what it's been like to go back to work. I have friends that work full time, friends that take care of their kids full time and friends that do all different shades of whatever is in the middle of those two. At the end of the day we are all trying to to the best for our families and be the best moms we can be. Period! (i.e. I'm not getting into the politics!) That said, I wanted to share my take on life as a working mom and a peek into a normal day for us.

Is it hard? Yes. 

Do I question if I'm doing the right thing for my family? Every. Single. Day. 

Is this what I choose as our long term solution? I don't know but it's working for now! 

Do I miss my kids and feel like I'm missing out on their daily lives? Always.

If only we could have it all or at least more time in the day!

Sometimes my roles and my time all bleeds together. Yes, I have someone taking care of my kids during the day, but not all of my Mom duties stop just because I'm at work. I still am shuttling the boy to school, going to doctor's appointments and buying diapers. And let's not forget my favorite activity, pumping! Sometimes I do Mom stuff during the day and sometimes I do work things after I put the kids down. I am thankful to have a job where they let me figure out how to make it all work. (Although I'm sure I've pushed the boundaries a time or two!)

Here's a typical day for us:

Everyday I get up around 6am and sometime between then and 7:30am I get dressed and ready for work, get Cooper dressed and fed on school days and get Carrington changed and fed. This goes in no particular order, whoever cries the loudest usually gets my attention and that is usually the Cooper boy. Thank goodness for iPads and Henry Hugglemonster.

We are out the door by 7:30 (on a good day) which is when my nanny gets to the house to watch Carrington. I drop Cooper off at school by 8 and head into the office. I put on my investor hat for a few hours until it is time to get Cooper from school around lunch. I pick him up, drive him home, shove some food in my mouth and head back to work. In order to keep up with the breastfeeding regime, I have to pump three times during the work day, while reading equity reports of course! Otherwise I pretend to be a perfectly normal investment analyst.

I leave the office by 5 to get home in time to spend an hour and a half with my kids before they go to bed. If that means I have to work after they go down that's what I do, but I rarely sacrifice my family time if I can help it!

There is nothing better than a Cooper smile and a big hug at the end of a long day. There is nothing worse than him getting mad at me when I get home and telling me "I'm going to WORK Mom!" As if I'm doing it to punish him...ouch.

During the week, I try to stick with easy dinners. Simple proteins to grill or bake, steamed veggies, salads and crockpot recipes are my friends! I grocery shop on Sunday afternoons for food for the entire week. This usually works, unless we run out of milk, blueberries or Bunny Snacks!

We start the bath and bed process around 7:15 every night and usually have both kids settled by 7:45. After this we clean up dinner, wash what feels like one thousand pump parts and pack Cooper's lunch for school the next day.

After everything is done, I'm usually good for a big glass of wine and some QT with the hubs.

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

My babies.

Pumpkin Patch! (You knew this was coming...)

Just as spring brings you pictures of babies in bluebonnets, it is now time for the obligatory post of kids in a pumpkin patch. And on a blanket in my front yard. Because I couldn't get a good one of them together without a lollipop bribe. Two year olds!

We went to our local plant nursery on Saturday to pick up some pumpkins and let Cooper do the kid activities they had planned for the first Saturday in October. Since the boy likes neither face painting nor popcorn, we headed over to the pumpkin decorating table. It was a free for all with tons of kids, tons of markers and the coolest thing ever for little kids, glue!  The affinity for glue is not shared by many Moms. I spent my time sticking things to the glue he was putting EVERYWHERE and tried to keep him off of everyone else's pumpkins. He "decorated" two pumpkins (i guess one for sister, oops!) in a matter of minutes and announced it was time to go. I was not so sad that our morning activity ended so abruptly!

Some pics from the day!

Sister was a good sport! 

Not having it. Not one part of it!

Oh Jeez. Glue EVERYWHERE!

His concentration face!

Much happier at home!

"Lollipop? OK!"

Bribes work.

Sweet rewards!

Never go to bed angry, OR...

Never go to bed angry. Or do, and wake up the next morning only to realize what a [bleep] you were being, apologize and make nice. I'm not sure who this sweet little saying works for, but sometimes I feel like you need the night to stew on things and wake up in a better state of mind. Especially when you're working and trying to parent two kids, one of which still gets up at night. (At least she's really cute!) Anybody with me on this?

A little backstory on how this train of thought came about...

This is a first world problem, for sure, but did you hear about the fluke with United a couple of weeks ago where all of the flights were listed online for $5? Yes, $5. Well, Kyle did and was able to snag tickets for us for NY around Christmas and also tickets to Denver in a few weeks. It all happened so fast he didn't even have a chance to call me before buying tickets. The NY trip is perfect. The Denver trip not so much.

First, the trip would require me to take 2 days off of work, 3 weeks after I return from leave and this is a really busy time of year. Eek. Second, I do not have enough milk stock piled for Carrington which means she'd be coming with us. What does one do in Denver, in the cold, with a 3 month old? 

See? First world problem for sure.

Anywho...Kyle really wants to go and brought up that if I didn't go, he would just go without me with one of his buddies. The weekend after he's gone for a Bachelor party. Yeah. Needless to say, at 10pm last night we were both tired and grumpy and neither his idea nor my responses went over too well! I won't bore you with the details, mainly because I woke up this morning embarrassed I took it to "that" level. "Why don't you just go to Denver and stay there!" REALLY, CASEY?!

In about 2.5 seconds this morning we were able to resolve that while it was bad timing, he would go but only if it's great weather. Wish we would have just given up and slept on it sooner! 

Moral of the story is that I'm throwing out the idea of not going to bed angry and sticking with: Everything is clearer in the light of day. Sleep on it, dummy!

I really don't know how I ever get mad at this face...

Back to work

My time is up. Twelve weeks came and went just like that. Maternity leave is over and I am headed back to work tomorrow. I am a mess.

Today started just like any other. I had a mile long list of things that had to be done on my last day off and so I loaded Cooper in the car to run around town with the promise of a park trip as a carrot at the end of the stick.

We stopped by the alterations place to pick up some pants. For whatever reason, Cooper decided the alterations guy's office building was the coolest place ever, much to the other tenants' chagrin. When I sensed that the title company and real estate employees had enough of a crazy two year old running around the "castle", I played my ace early and told Cooper it was time to go to the park. You would have thought I told him I was taking him for a root canal.

The power play that ensued was epic and embarrassing and at one point involved him laying face down in the parking lot. I called Kyle to tell him about it and he said it was just God's way of helping me let go before going back to work. I wholeheartedly agreed.

Then we got to the park and my attitude changed. We made nice and had a great time. As we turned to leave, Cooper said "Bye park! See you tomorrow!" And that's when I lost it. You see, tomorrow's got nothing on our park date.

So I naturally did what any mom-guilt-laiden gal would do and let him call the shots for the rest of our time. We may have ended up eating ice cream in the middle of the day!

Don't even get me started on this muffin!

(She's kind of rocking the Kate Gosslin. Don't judge.)

Who knew getting paid to stay home with your kids (a.k.a maternity leave) would be so wonderful?! Back to the real world!

Come here, big boy!

I'm a sucker for Cooper cuteness and he knows it. His latest scheme is to prolong the bedtime routine as long as possible. We give him a bath, read some books and tell him goodnight. When Kyle puts him down, this is when the bedtime routine ends. For me, he pulls out all of the stops.

Me: Goodnight bud, I love you.

Cooper: MOM! MOM! Come here! Hold my hand! Give him a five! Now bump it out! Bump it out again! Wots and wots of bump it out Mom!

Me: OK Cooper, I'm walking out now. I love you, goodnight!

C: MOM! My blanket! You has to keep him warm.

Me: [replace the blanket that was "accidentally" kicked off] I love you, goodnight!

All of these things (high five, fist bumps etc.) are very typical stall tactics. But, the other night things got a little WIERD!

C: MOM! Come here big boy!

Me: [dying laughing...silently] What?

C: Come here big boy! Let Cooper hold you!

At this point I am laughing hysterically...out loud...which does nothing but egg him on!

C: Come here big boy! Come here big boy!

I finally pulled myself together enough to tell him goodnight and walk out but this was by far the funniest thing he's ever said. We're working on the whole boy versus girl thing, but I think if he called me "Big Boy" forever I wouldn't be sad about it!

Here's one of the little stinker loving on his sister. He is finally over the "maybe if I ignore her she'll go away" stage and has started to pay some attention to her. This morning, he brought her all of his "stuff". If you know Cooper, you know this is a big deal! To be clear, the "stuff" consists of no more and no less than: Mista Snake, Mista Bear, Mista Monkey, Mista Blankey, Mista Lovey, Mista Nother Lovey, Mista Turtle and Mista Blue Turtle. You better believe these guys are part of the bedtime routine!

Adventures in Potty Training

I do not want to jinx myself. Therefore, I will NOT tell you about how Cooper started potty training this week.  Instead, here is a completely fictitious story about a little boy named Booper and his adventures in potty training.

Booper's Mom and Dad had tried for some time to get him interested in using the potty. They would tell him that if he went pee pee in the potty he could have one M&M. Over time, the bribe grew to five M&M's then an entire chocolate bar...to no avail. As his third birthday rounded into the not so distant future, they were trying anything just to gain interest. Booper could care less.

Then, on Sunday evening, Booper was playing with a puzzle that had musical instruments on it. He asked his mom about the only instrument on the puzzle that he didn't have, a harmonica. She told him that if he pee peed on the potty he could have one to which Booper replied, "OK!" Booper proceeded to march to the potty, sit down and use it as if he had been doing just that all of his life.

Booper's parents were ecstatic, and totally unprepared. Where does one find a harmonica at 7:30 at night? The answer is you don't. Booper's Dad searched everywhere but couldn't find one and came home with some Planes characters instead. This appeased Booper and bought enough time until his Mom could get out the next day and find one for him.

Poor Booper. His parents spent all of their energy trying to bribe him with chocolate when all he wanted was a danged harmonica!

Now Booper is not perfect, but he is trying and is successful 80% of the time. That's all his parents could ask for! Especially after wondering if they were going to be changing his diapers until his 4th birthday!

Ouch. Ouch, you're hurting me.

Someone should write a book called How to Outsmart the Two-year Old Who Just Outsmarted You. I would buy it.

Cooper's newest trick is to try to get out of something he doesn't want to do by saying "ouch". At home, this doesn't work. I could care less if he tells me "ouch" when I'm putting him into the bathtub or brushing his teeth. I KNOW these things don't hurt. He can yell it as loud as he wants...as long as the neighbors don't hear!

That's just it. When he says these things in public all of the sudden I'm rooted to the spot, fearful someone is going to call CPS on the little blonde child abuser!

Case in point, this is exactly what happened leaving a restaurant yesterday. Mind you, I have one arm full of take-out BBQ and am hurrying home to feed Carrington before she and Kyle both get cranky. Cooper, on the other hand, is perfectly content running up and down the hallway to and from the bathroom where some poor older woman had been parked for the last 10 minutes. (Bad food? Stage fright? Fear of two year olds? Who knows?!)

     Me: Cooper, we have our food. Time to go! (I grab his hand and start walking towards the door.)

     Cooper: OUCH MOM! OUUCCCCCHHHHHHH!

     Me: Come on buddy, I'm not hurting you. We have to hold hands in the parking lot.

I look around to see who is watching us while trying to figure our if saying "I'm not hurting you" isn't exactly what someone would say if they were hurting someone. I spy only one pair of raised eyebrows and try again.

     Me: [to no one in particular] Ha! Two year olds!

I grab a hold of his hand again which triggers him to throw himself on the floor.

     C: No hurting Cooper Mom! No hurting Cooper again! OUUCCCCHHHHHHH!

Again? Oh Lord. Where is this coming from? Do I yank him out kicking and screaming while trying to balance BBQ, a drink and my car keys? Do I practice my calm Mommy reasoning skills? (BAH!) Or, do I just let him run the hall one more time hoping a new round of people will circulate in and out and I can try a more stealthy grab-and-go? Too late. Thought for too long. He bolted and started running the hall again, pestering the poor lady doing God knows what in that bathroom.

Then, who comes stumbling out of that bathroom? My sweaty guardian angel with her crooked smile and a look that let Cooper know his cheeks were about to get pinched! He grabbed my hand and headed towards the door. Whew. Saved...this time!

This little stunt did earn him a blue cupcake from the bakery manager at HEB the other day. He told me to tell the cashier it was damaged. Think he felt sorry for me?

TOOT!